by Nick Andrea
- Self-acceptance. I started back on juice today. I had been planning to go four days on lemon water, alone, but last night my body was like, “Give me food.” I’m not talking about you run-of-the-mill hunger pains. I’m talking more instinctual than that. I was cooking this glorious meal for my girlfriend and my hand nearly raised the spoon to my mouth without checking with me, first. The other thing was that I started developing a thirst in my mouth and throat that water could not abate. It sounded like what one website called “true hunger.” So, I thought I should begin the fast-breaking process the next day.
Well, I struggled mightily with this decision. I wanted to honor my commitment to myself because I want to be a consistent, trustworthy man even though everything in my body was telling me to end it. In the end, however, I followed my gut.
I think honoring one’s commitments is important, even when one doesn’t keep them; then, understanding why one couldn’t. That is honorable and is a mark of the man I want to be. Nobody’s perfect and we shouldn’t expect ourselves to be, but for a man who’s only really fasted for one day at a time, three days is quite an effort. I now think it’s a great triumph.
My perspective from this experience is this: Change is better slow, steady, and stable then quick and jolting. I have friends who have both pushed themselves for seven days, yet within weeks returned to unhealthy lifestyles. They, I believe, were not balanced in their approach. On the other hand, if I am gentle with myself – perhaps my greatest challenge – then I believe I can build up my ability to fast for longer and longer periods of time, gradually, which will be much more enjoyable and sustainable.
- Puppy. Our puppy, Jackson, is just about a year old. He’s a good dog but also a pain in the ass. Yet, we had to babysit a friend’s dog, Rodjer, overnight and that has made us so much more grateful for Jackson.
See, Rodjer doesn’t walk well on a leash. He pulls all over the place. Nor is he good with puppies as he gets quite aggressive with them. Lastly, Rodjer is not as playful as Jackson. He’s too good for us. It’s like, “*Sigh*, go ahead and pet me.” Maybe we should send him to Cambridge where he can study advanced thermodynamics, or something.
Well, Jackson might listen when he wants to. He might pull sometimes, especially when he has to go to the bathroom. And, he might have more energy than my decrepit 30-year old body can handle sometimes. But, he’s still only a puppy. He actually does come when called, at least part of the time. He does slow down when walking when we slow down, part of the time. And, he loves to play, when he feels like. But, what have we got to worry about? He’s only a puppy! I am so grateful for this lesson. Jackson, I love you boy.